Saturday, January 8, 2011

A Swim Meet

Yes, I'm going to my swim meet today. After a month without swimming or leaving my road except for food shopping, I'm going outside. Heh.

I guess my parents thought it would be good to get outside. We've stopped the searches. I'm the only one who still believes he's out there. Well, Ken did, but he's...gone.

This is why I'm worried to go out in public. The one person I really talked to this whole time was murdered. What will happen if I go to a meet with hundreds of people?

I was able to go to his house today after I cleared a path down the driveway. Even though it snowed another 6 inches since I heard the sirens yesterday, I could still see the red and black staining the snow under the biggest tree in the yard. The Howler did the same thing to him as it did to the policeman. The body must have been taken away.

One of my friends on the team, Mike, is Ken's nephew. I don't know if he heard the news yet. God, I hope not. If he did I hope he's not at the meet. He was so close to Ken. He'll be distraught.

I have to admit this somewhere. I cried yesterday when I knew it was Ken. It wasn't even out of sadness. It was the fact that he was my biggest clue to my brother's disappearance. Oh God, I'm so selfish.

Why did this happen to my family? And why are all the decisions that could kill anybody I know resting on me? hhhhh. I can barely move now, but I have to go. Heh, wish me luck I guess.


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